Thursday and then some

I really have a million other things that I *should* be doing right now, but I have to just throw this out there.

This week has been tumultuous thus far. I really can't say that I wasn't expecting all hell to break loose, but not like this.

Aside from various doctor's appointments and whatnot, yesterday was litterally a day straight out of the bad book. It didn't start off totally awful, it was just a normal day. Except I woke up at 5:30 in the morning filled with this intense guilt that I'm a bad mother to Marilyn and that it is my fault that she is so little and all I have done is neglect her since I found out I was pregnant right after last Christmas.

Now I know all of those things are not true, it was a rough summer, but we had a lot of fun. She's petite. I don't expect her to be huge. Look at my sister, look at my sister when she was little, people thought Nicole and Holly were twins because they were the same size. Nicole is petite. Mark and I are both long and lean types of people who don't tack on weight very easily (except when I'm pregnant, then no fat can get past me). But I don't know. At the WIC appointment today she weighed 23 pounds, which still isn't a ton, but she gained a pound since our last appointment and they reassured me, very strongly reassured me, that at two years old, eating habits are usually not very good. Which I say this, she eats at daycare, she eats with EVERYONE else. But when she's at home, she doesn't want to eat what we offer. Yesterday I made the most delicious broccoli cheese soup which she normally LOVES. And she wouldn't eat it. So I had to feed it to her so that she would eat it. But dinner time and breakfast and lunch time are all not so much fun around here because all she ever WANTS to eat is junkfood. The WIC lady just said to not give in and offer her good foods and that she will eat when she is hungry and I'm not starving her.

I really think that all of these awful mother types of feelings have been stirred up because of what I'm learning in class. It's terrible stuff really. I've been learning about malnourished children and failure to thrive and premature babies. It's really sad. And I don't know, everything changes once you are a parent, I mean, yeah, this sounds really hokey, but I get choked up at movies sometimes and there's other stuff that I can't even tolerate anymore. I'm much more sensitive to the awful things of the world. Even little Ethiopian babies with extended stomachs and skinny legs.

But back to yesterday.

I woke up at 5:30, did a study guide and some research, before I realized it it was already 9:30 and so I rushed Marilyn out of bed and we all got ready and got out of the door. The rest of the day progressed as usual. We went to the grocery store later on and Marilyn was fantastic. I let her help put everything in the cart and she got to ride on the bottom of the cart and she even tried sneaking some candy onto the checkout counter. But it wasn't super stressful at all. Then we got home.

Now Mallory is usually very very very very good. So I can't really complain. But yesterday she was being a bit tempermental about going to sleep and staying asleep (my #1 issue with her usually). Well, from 3:30 to 5 was hectic anyhow, but at about 5ish, when Mark got home, Mallory just wouldn't go to sleep at all then (and she was already overtired). She cried and cried and cried and cried and cried. Almost 5-6 hours of it last night.

And then on top of all of that, while I was FINALLY settling her down for a minute to actually get her to bed, we hear this big crash and guess what?

Marilyn had opened up her dresser drawers and had knocked the dresser down from climbing on it and the whole thing fell on top of her.

Talk about scary.

So at one point last night, I have Marilyn screaming, Mallory screaming and Mark was freaking out.

Not fun.

But Marilyn just had a little bit of a goose egg on her head, which went down after we put ice on it. Within half an hour she was jumping all over the bed and singing the clean up song and jumping all over Mark. So she was fine. I called a nurse-line and they said to put ice on it and watch for unusual behavior and just keep checking on her. But she's just fine and dandy. Within an hour after that incident then, I finally got Mallory to sleep (after she screamed her little head off the whole time though).

And on top of all of that, my house was a disaster zone and Mark accidently broke one of my little plates. So now I'm down another plate. I think I'll get a new set maybe in February. We'll see if I can find something I like.

Oh yeah, and then I also had to wake up this morning at the crack of dawn so we could get ready for our WIC appointment. Mark then, was supposed to go with us, but I insisted that he stay home because he was throwing up and looked like crap.

*Sigh* This being the only responsible person business is tough stuff. I'm really not too fond of it somedays. Ugh.

But all in all, today is much much much much better. Mallory is in her swing, sleeping away, I've accomplished some run-around cleaning. I've got diapers on the second wash, almost ready to pop in the dryer, Marilyn was in good spirit this morning and so far we haven't lost any limbs. I'll have time to prepare everything because then today we have two meetings later to go to that are back to back and we won't be getting home until 9ish or so.

Is it Friday yet?