Communication.
Ah, such a simple concept. Such a simple thing, to communicate. To go back and forth talking with someone.
It's wonderful. Refreshing.
And totally a pain in my life.
I have a lot of other things that I *should* be doing right now, like essential work, but something just clicked and I've been thinking about writing this blog for awhile.
There is no excuse for poor communication.
I'm talking about people who just refuse to communicate. They never call you back, respond to your e-mail, answer your texts, nothing. I don't know what is going on. It is polite to give someone some closure on a situation. A simple, 'I don't want to talk to you' will suffice. I get it. Not everyone likes to talk to everyone else. By refusing to communicate it sends many mixed signals and mixed communications and indeed if it is that you never want to talk to me again, I prefer the straightforward method. Just tell me.
I'm also talking about people with flawed communication practices. I am guilty of this myself sometimes as well. People who let so much time go past between communications that they send mixed signals all around. Do you want to talk to me? Maybe? Are you really busy? Maybe? Are you just a bad communicator? Maybe? Too many maybes. Call me crazy.
I also don't like communicators who refuse to discuss something directly with you. I've had a student complain and this has really peeved me out over the past week. People feel more liberal and at ease when they are taking their complaints somewhere else. Although I do not think that student would admit to me directly what she thought, if it was a legitimate complaint and concern, that is something that is able to be discussed. However, even though that person felt free to run her mouth about how she thinks I'm so disorganized and tardy, I doubt she would ever say that to my face, because it isn't a legitimate complaint.
I am also talking about people who say one thing and mean something else. If you say it, please mean what you say. If you don't quite know what you mean, then perhaps say that instead. Sarcasm and jokes are always great, however, not so much if you take them seriously and the other person does not correct them. It is also proper etiquette to curb your humor around those who might not understand it properly. I have that issue, a lot of people don't get my jokes or they mistakenly believe the outrageous things I spout for the fun of it. Somethings I say purposefully for the shock value, but what I have learned is just that not everyone understands my sense of humor and I just have to roll with it.
My ex is the worst communicator I have ever come across and there were verbal altercations yesterday which I always enjoy. He does this thing (and I know he is doing it because I have been subject to this phenomena for YEARS) where he will bring something up and get mad at me because *supposedly* he told me whatever he had to say the LAST time we spoke, which I know is completely untrue. He hates communicating with me. He is truly the only person I have ever come across that will hear something completely different than what I say and then hears many things as well that I didn't say. He would tell me so much that I would listen to and then he tells me things that I never hear apparently. All of the time. That's where he gives himself away. My memory isn't that spotty and I definitely would remember some of the things he *supposedly* told me, so why don't I then? That doesn't make sense. I could go on and on about the negatives associated with him and our communication issues, but that is room for a different blog and he is going to sabotage himself with his children if he keeps it up. I hate liars.
Last but not least, straightforwardness. Do it. Say it. Just get it out and into the open. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Don't beat around the bush. If you can't say it, write it, text it. Actions always speak louder than words though.
Communicators!
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